Old School Movie Ratings

I've been meaning to watch 'Raiders of the Lost Ark' for absolutely ages. It's been years, and this cold November evening seemed like the perfect opportunity to revisit THE action adventure film of my youth. But wait, kids are allowed to watch this movie? Check out this list of stuff that happens and then tell me how this film is rated P-freaking-G.

1. A rotting dead guy on some spikes

2. Alfred Molina dead on some spikes

3. South American guy dead with loads of peashooter arrows in his back

4. Indy shoots guy on fire IN THE FOREHEAD (blood everywhere)

5. Indy shoots Arab swordsman in broad daylight

6. Nazi Colonel's face shrivels like a raisin with blood pouring for every orifice.

7. Indy runs over blonde Nazi in big truck.

8. Belloq's head EXPLODES during the opening of the ark.

9. Toht's Nazi face melts and all his skin comes off and there's blood everywhere.

10. Big Nazi guy gets churned up by airplane propellor blades and blood goes everywhere.

I feel like I could go on! In this day and age, I would expect 'Raiders' to warrant at least a 12A. If someone can explain how 'The Matrix' is a 15, and 'Raiders' a PG, I've love to hear it.

This is not to say that I didn't enjoy 'Raiders'. Of course I did. Faces melted and heads exploded. It just left me wondering just how film classification has evolved in the last 30 years. What other films were incorrectly classified simply because of the era in which they were made? I've managed to rustle up a few examples, but I'd welcome any more suggestions anyone might have. So...

1. 'Hostel 2' and 'Once'. One involved slashing penises and blood showers. The other was about two Irish musicians falling in love. Yet, in America, both received an R-rating meaning that if you were under 17, a parent or guardian was required to accompany you. Go figure.

2. 'The King's Speech' receiving an R-rating in the States. Are you seriously telling me that kids under the age of 17 shouldn't be watching this charming, period drama just because it has a teeny tiny amount of swearing in a purely therapeutic context? Come off it.

3. 'Watership Down'. That whole movie should have been at least a 15. Apparently the BBFC still receive complaints about it's U-rating to this day.

4. Whilst researching questionable movie ratings, I just discovered that 'Jaws' is a PG. SAY WHAT?

5. 'The Witches'. Anyone who remembers the film adaptation of this Roald Dahl classic knows exactly what I'm talking about. When the witches all take their wigs off? Remember? Absolutely bloody terrifying. Nevertheless, rated U!

6. 'Chitty Chitty Bang Bang'. Say what you want about this Disney classic. The child catcher was a massive paedo and that film would get slapped with an 18-rating if it were released today. And to think people are calling for films with smoking to be reclassified. Pfft.

7. 'Poltergeist'. Strangely enough, this was a 15 in the UK and a PG in the states. That's right. A PG. Not only is it scary as balls but a man RIPS HIS OWN FACE OFF.

It's hardly surprising then that Steven Spielberg is in fact partly responsible for the existence of the PG-13 rating in the States. So many of his films pushed the boundaries of what was acceptable in a PG that a good few of them (including 'Temple of Doom') were reclassified once the PG-13 rating was introduced as the median between PG and R. This was as a direct result of Spielberg lobbying Jack Valenti and the Motion Picture Association of America to push the rating through so that the Temple of Dooms of this world could exist without parental scrutiny. As far as I know though, 'Raiders of the Lost Ark' remains but a PG. Shocking.

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Dissertation banter

So, my girlfriend is writing her dissertation this year. Luckily for me (we live together), she's writing about one of my favourite films, 2001: A Space Odyssey. When I say she's writing about it, of course I mean that she's become completely besotted by everything 2001. Every book, every documentary; she's seen it and she's read it. She's even spoken on the phone with the writers of the books (well, the ones that live in Norwich anyway). Witnessing this kind of passionate (but not quite obsessive), 'dive right in' attitude has got me thinking. What film or filmmaker is going to win my heart in two years time? At the moment it's a toss up...

1. Christopher Nolan/Inception - As much as I admire Nolan and all of his work (even Insomnia!), I can't imagine I'd be alone in my wonderment. In my first week on the course I met a girl who was writing her dissertation on 'Batman Begins'. Point proven.

The philosophy of 'Inception' is fascinating to me. It has been since the first time I saw it. In the year or so since release, at least two books have been published about exactly this. It's definitely something I would consider, but as I say, I would fully expect the work of Nolan (especially 'Inception') to be a hot topic among the minds in my year group and would probably opt for something a little bit more personal to me.

2. Terrence Malik/Cinematography - Another director who is fascinating to me; not only because of the quality of his work, but because of the way he makes movies. A man shrouded in privacy, Malik one of the most respected but most reclusive figures in the history of cinema. These reasons alone make him of particular interest to me.

Should I choose to focus on a particular element of Malik's work, it would (without hesitation) be the cinematography on display. 'The Tree of Life' and 'The Thin Red Line' are modern classics by all accounts, beautifully shot and beautifully told from start to finish. I, of course, would want to go back further still to his earlier films, 'Badlands' and 'Days of Heaven'. The latter of which, Christopher Nolan himself cites as one of the main reasons he felt compelled to dedicate his life to filmmaking. Big talk, no?

There are certain cinematograhical traits Malik possesses that I would certainly like to explore further at some point over the next three years. Whether or not I end up deciding to undertake something (and someone) so grandiose, God only knows.

3. Saving Private Ryan and it's importance in modern culture - Had there been no 'Saving Private Ryan', there would be no Call of Duty, no Band of Brothers, no The Pacific, and almost no renewed interest in World War 2. The success of 'Saving Private Ryan' offshot into a million directions and is still regarded just as highly almost 15 years on. Spielberg was able to capture the glory and the humanity of war, and as a result spawned a new generation of WW2 films, and eventually video games.

4. The symmetry of Wes Anderson - Anyone who's ever watched more than one Wes Anderson film has more than likely recognised that one of his most interesting traits is the fact that almost every shot of every scene is almost entirely symmetrical. This is no accident. Wes Anderson is a master of set design and shot framing. It makes his films easy to watch and easy to feel, when everything is so concisely placed.

Not only would I like to explore why he does this, and how effective it is when it comes to storytelling, but I would want to explore a possible link between Anderson's film and obsessive/compulsive disorder. I have a friend who suffers from this disorder and he absolutely adores everything Wes. I would want to know if a link has already been documented, if there is evidence that particular films and they way they are shot appeal to certain types of people who see and feel the world around them in a specific way.

Four is enough to be marinating on, wouldn't you say? Teatime on this cold Autumnal evening.